5 Principles To Deal With Failure

5 min readOct 17, 2019

In this article, I am sharing my views on Failure Management, in form of 5 Principles

1) Failure is Inevitable

Nothing can life can be a cakewalk

Anything in life that is worth having comes with failure before.

“You might never fail on the scale I did, but some failure in life is inevitable. It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all — in which case, you fail by default. “ J K Rowling

So lets say, if you are pursuing a Distance MBA — you pay the fee, you will get the material, appear for exam and you will clear — but will that achievement usually count on your CV? Because the other person across the table also knows the complexity. So if in the Indian context, you crack the UPSC or complete CA/MBA from a Tier 1 college, people are going to say Wow. Because they know that there is massive risk involved. You have overcome a lot of failure.

So, just like to get heaven, you have to first die — to succeed, you have to first fail.

2) There is no stigma attached to failure

In the Indian society, we always want to play it safe. We tread the common, conventional path because there is greater chance of success. If we fail, relatives make life hell for you.

Oh, you failed in an exam ?

Oh, you did an MBA and didn’t get good placements

That is their standard tormenting refrain

That is the sad mentality .

In the startup world, you succeed only if you can risk failure. Thats why, Indian IT companies ended up focusing on risk-free Service Delivery model, playing on the rupee-dollar arbitrage and supplying tech-coolies to countries like USA which eventually created a product like Gmail, Facebook, LinkedIn. Why we couldn’t do it — because we couldn’t take risks.

My PGPX at IIM Ahmedabad was a major risk — I risked failure . What if I ended up spending 21.5 lacs, foregoing an year of salary and not getting anything back in terms of jazzy placements. Will relatives mock me? But I took that risk and ended up with the commercial launch of CAJobportal.com, which my wife @SoniaSingal now handles.

3) We fail because we focus on the Ends, not the Means

Our great defect in life is that we are so much drawn to the ideal, the goal is so much more enchanting, so much more alluring, so much bigger in our mental horizon, that we lose sight of the details altogether. But whenever failure comes, if we analyze it critically, in ninety-nine per cent of cases we shall find that it was because we did not pay attention to the means — Swami Vivekananda

Once you have set your goal, say acquiring a degree, getting a specific job; stop worrying about the end result. Your aspiring for that specific goal is no big deal. There are hundreds of people like you who aspire for the same thing. Instead of worrying- will I get it, will I not, focus on the means. The exam has to be cracked snatching every single mark from the examiner, the interview will move question by question. You have to get over the sense of self-entitlement — as I often say — “aap zindagi ke jamai nahi hai”

4) Self help books and motivational videos to cope with failure

Nowadays, when many people fail, they surround themselves with self-help books and motivational videos. Self-help books mostly help only the author become successful. Its easy to pump someone today in form of a motivational video — “Follow your dreams and the rest will follow. aankhen band karo and bolo “aasan hai”. ( close your eyes and say its easy). You can surround yourself with spiritual gurus who claim to help you find your passion and purpose. But can you really detach yourself if you havent acquired what you wanted.

So instead of the hallucination — face the real world and try to still get what you want. One of my juniors, Saloni — a CA fresher in May’19, who through randomness became a second attempt CA instead of a first attempt, eventually braved her way through this multi-round interview process at Nestle and proved that she wasnt a rankholder/first attempt ( but still was good enough to get the offer rollout. So, she could then say no to companies which allotted her CTC and division based on attempts. Thats the effective way you cope with setbacks.

5) The role of a guru / a mentor / a Chanakya

Sometimes, we keep repeating the same mistake and expecting different results — just like you have inserted the charger pin in your mobile phone, the adapter is in the switchboard and you are cribbing that its not charging. Suddenly someone points out that you have forgotten to put the switch on .

A junior of mine Ayush kept appearing for CA Final — spending 80% of his energies on a subject on Information Systems — ISCA. And eventually kept failing as ISCA wasnt his cup of tea. I finally suggested him to shift to the New Scheme. He was apprehensive that Group 1 under New Scheme will be tough. I told him that the question for Group 1 would arise only if he cleared Group 2 — which in my opinion wouldnt happen if he continues the losing battle with ISCA. Much to my happiness, he agreed to my suggestion and cleared Group 2 sans ISCA in the first attempt after the shift i.e.Nov’18. He has recently qualified as a CA in May’19 after clearing Group 1 as well.

Thats the role of a Guru, a mentor , who can give you brutal feedback — say for instance, that you are into the wrong path, which is not in sync with your core capabilities.

My taking up Science in Class XI, lured by the IIT+IIM leading to that 1 crore Investment Banking job was one such decision, which was completely against my basic DNA — my veins had Accountancy & Commerce flowing into them since childhood. Only a mentor eventually , after Class 12, convinced me to shift to Commerce, notwithstanding the so-called stigma

If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid — that is what my mentor said

A good mentor will tell you the Inconvenient Truth instead of the Convenient Lie

Its another question that in terms of supply and demand for mentor-ship, not many successful professionals bother about sparing time for youngsters — they are too focused on their own careers, their own battles . And maybe youngsters also often take someone who is available for a ride. However, that a discussion thread for another day.

So, please do ponder on these 5 principles . There are available in video format on my YouTube channel

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